Yesterday I found myself on a sunset boat tour through limestone islands with a 49-year-old divorcee named Tom. These situations have started happening: where I sign up for a tour (alone) that is meant to be fairly romantic.
Unfortunately, these situations are inevitable...because lusty-Sandals-commercial-couples are not the only ones who like sunsets. (My recent hostel roommate, also a solo female traveler, told me about a night cruise she had in Vietnam where it was her, two couples, and a Finnish David Hasselhoff. Apparently, she and Hasselhoff awkwardly interacted, and essentially third wheeled the couples’ cruise.)
As I thought these Sandals couples may opt for a more relaxing excursion like my roommate’s night cruise, I opted for a kayak self-paddle tour through bat caves. I also wanted to do something active, and for whatever reason, it was substantially cheaper to paddle yourself. Done and done.
Apparently, I was the only person who thought this way as I received this email from the tour company, Sea Canoe, a few hours before pick up:
“Dear Paige, Congratulation as today we arrange PRIVATE to u alone, as the guests who booked before u to NO SHOW. So we still run for U as you are really want to do and changed date to check out in order to take the self paddle trip.”
Okaaaaaay, Sandals couples avoided!
The drive to the motor boat, which would take me to the kayak site in Thailand's Phang Nga Bay, took roughly an hour. Once stopped, the van door swung open and I was greeted in English by a short, flip-flopped Thai man. “Alright, it’s just us!”
Tom didn’t sound super enthusiastic per se. Not unexcited, but I imagine that he, too, was a little baffled that a crew of five would be providing a tour to one person.
Regardless, we were both committed at this point. So we made our way to Sea Canoe’s motor boat and pulled away from shore.
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| Slightly eerie to be on an empty boat.... |
While the crew was feeding me lunch, Tom started talking about our upcoming tour. He asked me if I prefer sit-on or sit-in kayaks, showed me our 10-kilometer route through Panak Island, and gave me a binder of information on poisonous creatures and plants. Maybe this was why the Sandals couples didn’t show...
Once anchored near Panak Island, Tom launched me (and my kayak) into the water. He pointed to a dark hole on Panak Island and told me to go there.
I can't say that this was my INNATE reaction. But, I listened to Tom and just started paddling toward the darkness...and eventually, in darkness (until I could turn on my headlamp).
Yet, it turns out that kayaking through a pitch-black cave equipped only with a headlamp is surreal. I tried to keep up with Tom as we meandered through calm waters that twisted and turned. Every now and again, I would see the shadow of a bat fly across my field of vision. Looking up, I saw hundreds of them hanging upside down from the (high) ceiling.
We emerged from this bat cave into an equally calm lagoon. We saw trees with roots suspending them above the water, amphibians hiding in the mud and ferns that vertically blanketed the enclosed cliffs. Our exit was through another dark hole in front of us.
So, into the darkness again.
Tom and I kayaked through multiple bat caves and lagoons as I learned a LOT about his life. He was 49, separated from his wife, had a teenage daughter, financed his scooter. I learned about the history of the company and the local competition for sea canoe tourism.
We eventually got to the point in our guide/guided relationship where he would actually “shhh” me. Mainly it was to tell me to stop hitting my kayak with the paddle so that we could actually hear the birds that sounded like monkeys.
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| See?! |
Either Tom had a ton of conviction or he really did know the answers to all of my incessant questions, but he was able to rattle off convincing answers. He had names for the types of rocks (in both Thai and English), the various birds, each surrounding islands. I really should have kept going with trivia, but I was focusing on paddling quietly.
Eventually, Tom and I made our way to a small private beach on Panak Island. This would have been one of those moments the Sandals couples enjoyed, but instead, it was just me and Tom. Thankfully, he made his way back to the boat, which was anchored within eyeshot, after a good long minute so that I could relax (alone).
I dragged my kayak onto the beach and sat pensively for about 15 minutes. I brushed the little ants off my shorts and shirt until there were a few too many to remove. Turns out, my pensive rock was adjacent to an ant pile. With no hesitation, I jumped in the water (fully clothed) and hid from the ants until I felt a slight sting on my ankle.
Really, these situations are lose-lose. Either deal with ants or apparently get stung by tiny jellyfish.
I took both of those as my signs to head back to the boat, which was a good decision as Tom and the crew greeted me with spring rolls, cashew chicken, fried rice, soup, and lemongrass. I quickly engulfed my meal, and we began the 45-minute trek home.
I found my spot on the top deck of the boat surrounded by empty seats in order to watch the sunset over the limestone cliffs. Tom, the only other English speaker in the crew, sat across the deck from me as the boat bounced through small waves back to the pier.
I never would have guessed that this 49-year old tour guide would be my only other companion on a sunset boat cruise through picturesque islands. C’est la vie. So, we talked about bat caves and the past 10km we paddled and the local poisonous animals. And of course, each of us separately enjoyed watching the sunset over Phang Nga Bay.
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